How Much Do Your Kids Know About God?

“Do your kids know more about God than you did at their age?”  A preacher just asked on TV.  Wow!  Did that smack me in the face!  I asked myself that question, and my answer is, “No.”   And I know whose fault it is – mine.

Growing up in the pastors’ home gave me a very interesting perspective on life and the Word of God.  My grandma lived with us, and she was a Sunday school teacher, (does anyone remember flannelgraph?) so she would practice on my sister and me, not to mention the fact that she drilled the Scriptures in to us daily anyway.

It cracks me up to watch TV preachers, and they are telling a story about “sister so and so” and the preacher fills the pauses with “bless God”, or “thank you, Jesus”.  My parents didn’t and don’t talk like that basically in or out of the pulpit.  I’m not saying that is bad, bless God, but what I am saying is that my parents, thank you, Jesus, were real.  Hallelujah.

I’m going to list a few things my parents did that made me very knowledgeable as a child.  I’m going to be honest and say that I should have learned better from my parents.  Some of this is my fault, I take the blame, there is no condemnation, I’m just going to own it and if I can, fix it, some things just can’t be duplicated, and that’s fine too.

First, My parents made me go to church – every time the doors opened.  We had church Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night, the youth met on Friday nights.  My school records will show that I was late or even absent most Mondays and Thursdays.   My parents believed that the Word of God was the most vital education I could receive.  They were right.  Ronda and I both were good students, so our absences really didn’t affect our grades or learning – too much.   I have not been a good example at going to church every time the doors opened, nor have I made my children go every time … I think that needs to change.

Second, My parents did not allow me to become distracted by things outside of the church realm.   I remember I was about eight years old, and I wanted to take dance lessons.  Well at that time dancing outside of the Holy Ghost two step was frowned upon, so my mom found me an alternative – gymnastics.  I was a rolley polley thing anyway.  

Gymnastics class was on a Wednesday, so I had to promise my mom that I would do my homework and still have enough energy to make it to church and get up on Thursday morning.   Yeah, that lasted about 3 months.   Church always came first.  I’m not telling you not to put your kid in little league, but I am saying that if the activity affects your ability to get to church, well, you know how my parents would have handled it.

Third, My parents inundated us with second hand knowledge… what do I mean by that?   Well, my mom worked from home, she was the music director.  So by no choice of our own, we knew the new worship songs and choir numbers before anyone else did.  We didn’t have ear phones and an ipod, we had a reel to reel tape thingy in our living room.

My parents watched Christian television and listened to other ministers’ tapes.  Guess where the TV was and who had priority over it.   Guess who didn’t get to hear her favorite radio station or tape in the car.  Us! Us! Us!    My mom was a bit savvy, though.   My parents would watch TV and listen to the radio with us so that we weren’t completely ignorant of what was going on in the world.   They just kept a much closer eye on our media than I have even thought to do for my kids.

Fourth, My parents sacrificed for us to attend Christian school.   This is monumental in how I have raised my kids.  I never attended public school.   Ronda did for I think about 2 years.  She was so unhappy at her Christian school and was able to attend the local public school with her friend the next door neighbor, so my parents allowed it.  When Ronda hit 9^th grade, my parents found us a new Christian school, Ronda never really was happy in public school.

Yes, I felt sheltered.   I had friends who went to public school - dang, did they know more about the world than I did.  They knew how to inhale, they knew how to get birth control, they knew how to strip down to nothing in front of everyone while changing for sports, they knew whose parents were going to be away for the weekend and where the liquor cabinet was,  and oh, did they have really neat vocabulary words I had never heard. 

Well yes, you can get all of those things at Christian school, too … but at Christian school eventually someone blabs and a caring staff member can intervene before too much is too much.  I think there is a key here, a caring staff member that can intervene.  At Christian school, all of the teachers are Christians, so not only are they looking out for you academically, but spiritually, too.

Fifth, My parents modeled a consistent study and prayer life.   Ewww, that’s definitely got to change in my house now.   Like most normal families we sat down at the table and ate dinner together, we usually had to move my mom’s bible to set the table, and we prayed before every meal.   They would walk around the house singing a Christian song, or praying in the spirit.   We knew when my mom was going in to her room to pray, and my grandma left her door open.

I haven’t talked too much about my dad.  He would have his prayer and study time before we got up, or in his office, or at Denny’s.   We knew how long it took to prepare a sermon.   We knew what was going on in his mind and his life because my parents talked in front of us, modeling good communication.

My parents did a much better job than I did.  I can say that without condemnation to myself, it is o.k. The home I grew up in is different than the home I have given my children.    For one thing it was clean all of the time – haha.

There are so many more areas that my parents were smarter, more dedicated, and more tenacious about.   Yet, I thank God that I have 2 great boys.  Both of my boys are born again, spirit filled, knowledgeable about God and on the right path.

Those words from that TV preacher just struck a chord with me.  “Do my kids know as much about God as I did at their age?”  No, but I can do my best to be asked that question in two years and be able to say, “yes.”

K

Don't Go It Alone

In my Bible reading today I came across a chapter that I would normally disregard or just scan through.  Today I actually read it - the last chapter of the book of Romans.  The Apostle Paul had great wisdom and understanding throughout this book, which is essentially a very, very long letter.  But what caught my attention was all of the shout outs he gave to his homies starting with the first verse of the 16^th chapter.

Suddenly it occurred to me.  We all hear about the Apostle Paul and his great exploits for the Gospel.  Many babies have been named Paul in honor of this great man.  But wait, almost the whole last chapter is Paul recognizing the people he could not have completed his ministry without.  Why don’t we name our kids Sosipater, Phlegon, or Tryphosa?    Where would Paul be if it had not been for these people?   Paul would still be sitting on the side of the road to Damascus, blind, waiting for Ananias to come get him.

What’s my point?  We can’t do it alone.  Even with all of the grief they caused, Jesus still had the three, Peter, James and John with Him.   Taking Jesus and Paul as our example, we can see that we are not expected to go it alone.  The Garden of Eden wasn’t complete until God made a second human.  If we think of it with our finite minds, not even God is alone, He is the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

Recently a woman that I have known for many years and had many friendly encounters with had horrendously painful surgery.   Although we had never been close, she sought my opinions, prayer and support regarding her surgery and we bonded.  Now I call her my true friend.   We have a thread on facebook that when she is down she will write, “my pain level is unbearable.”   There are three other women on that thread – one of us responds as quickly as possible with “you can do it, you are going to be ok.”

Sometimes all we need is someone to tell us that “you are going to be ok.”   I love it when someone says, “I’m praying for you.”   What makes me laugh is when someone says, “I’m sending good vibes.”  I appreciate it.  That means that they are thinking of me, and in their own way showing their support.  I prefer prayer, but heck I’ll take what I can get.

Today someone on my Facebook feed posted “I think I’m going to give up church.”   Oh, dear Lord, how many times I have wanted to give up church.  The last thing I want to do on a Sunday morning is roll out of bed and get dressed.   Wednesday nights are like pulling teeth for me.  I want to sit in my chair and watch TV.   Don’t we all?

Here was my comment, “I would love to give up on church. But it would be going against what God wants for me. At church I can feel closer to Him, even if I'm tired of looking at the building. At church I can feel His love through His people, even though I really don't know or like them. At church there is an anointing when the music plays even if it isn't my style of music. At my church even if my mind is wandering while the speaker is speaking, the Word of God is going in to my spirit. I'm tired of the almost 40 year old building, I’m tired of having to smile and be friendly when I feel like crap, I don’t want to put my make up on and get in the car and go, but I do it because God wants me to, and I always feel better after I go.”

God doesn’t want us to go it alone.  The best place to find those who will support us is at church.  God doesn’t want us to be lonely.  The best place to find like minded people is at church.   God wants us to share ourselves.  The best place to share one’s self is in a safe haven.    

Don’t feel like you have to go it alone.  Jesus didn’t, the Apostle Paul didn’t, Adam didn’t … you shouldn’t either.

K

Distracted ... I wonder if ... squirrel!

 For this nation’s heart has grown gross (fat and dull), and their ears heavy and difficult of hearing, and their eyes they have tightly closed, lest they see and perceive with their eyes, and hear and comprehend the sense with their ears, and grasp and understand with their heart, and turn and I should heal them. – Jesus, Matthew 13

With all that has been going on in our nation these days, you may think I’ve used this verse for others.  Nope, I’m using for myself.   I have become fat and dull, my ears have been difficult of hearing, and my eyes have been closed.   I am not looking, perceiving, or seeking the manifestations of God.  I have become “weary in well doing” and become lazy.   I have become like the person that hears the Word of God but life becomes too distracting and the nourishment of the Word is let go.

I have been a Christian since before I can remember.  I have asked Jesus to be my savior probably a thousand times.   I have read my Bible, gone to church, been active in church, told others about Jesus, prayed for others, done God’s will, listened to His voice – but I have become distracted by the things around me, and I have no longer been relying with my whole heart on Him.

Becoming a Christian at such an early age has its benefits, it also has its pitfalls.  Because Jesus has been with me my whole life, I have taken that relationship with Him for granted.  I know He is there, I know that the God-head is looking out for me.  I seek my comfort and wisdom from the Holy Spirit, I talk to God on a daily basis, but I have not been seeking Him.

It is kind of like marriage.  That person is there, you know that person will come through for you in the end, so you go on with life, let the kids distract you, let the finances distract you, have conversation that isn’t deep or meaningful – just dealing with the things of life.   All of a sudden you wake up and go, oh, I’ve been taking our relationship for granted, I need to invest some time, so you go on a date, or a weekend away, and boom, you are cured.

I’ve done the same thing with God, and I am sorry.   The coolest thing, is that God knows.  His feelings aren’t hurt, He’s not distracted, He is right there, ready for me, and we don’t even have to go on a date, I just have to take the time to invest in Him.

So, here I go.  I guess I will be sharing a Scripture every day for the rest of the month.  I have will have some personal attachments to that Scripture, and I may share it, and I might not.  But it is time to invest, it is time to seek, it is time to put the distractions to rest, and work on my side of the relationship.

I hope you will join me.

K

Depression Has Many Faces

Last night was an historic event for our family.   My sister was honored to give the student address at her graduation ceremony where she received her Bachelor’s degree.  I was not going to miss this night. To the unknowing eye, I am sure that I looked perfectly normal.   I had on a cute summer dress, jewelry, make up, my hair had curls in it, and at sometimes I was even wearing a genuine smile.

We look pretty normal

After the ceremony my kids wanted to know if we were going to get food with friends, which is usually our custom after big events.   I looked over at Jeff (my husband) and we were a bit removed from the crowd, and said, “The kids want to know what we are doing, I am going to go home and cry.”  Jeff, a pro at this now looked at me and said, “Ok.  I probably will go home too, and eat.”

My dear friend was in earshot and apparently faceshot of our conversation, and started laughing.   She said in her laughter, “I love it, Jeff!  You had the perfect look on your face and said ‘OK!’ like it was no big deal!”   I explained it was no big deal.   The boys are accustomed to it as well.    I often speak to them with tears rolling down my face.   They just act as if the tears aren’t there, and go on with life.  No one is in denial, we just don’t need to make a big deal out of a small symptom.

Yesterday, my son, Jarrod, sat and we discussed a situation he had on his heart.  He was concerned for a friend who comes from a very dysfunctional family.   I commented that if you are in our home we look dysfunctional with me camped out on the couch.   I was very surprised by Jarrod’s reaction.   He said, “yes, but you have a real condition, you have a medical condition, and you don’t do that (sit on the couch) when you’re not having problems.”

To me, if anyone sees inside my house, they see the face of depression.   The dishes aren’t done;  the laundry is in the middle of being folded on the couch; the furniture hasn’t been dusted in a month; general clutter is all around, and I am sitting on my butt.   But my child expects that when his friends walk in the door, they don’t see all of those things, because he doesn’t – that was a revelation to me.

The face of depression takes many forms.  For me, in certain circumstances it is the proper me with the sometimes genuine smile;  other times it is a pony tail, messy clothes and no make up; in my home its my jammies sitting on the couch sometimes crying, and usually escaping into a facebook game or old movie.  My family doesn’t see the face of depression – they see me.  And I cry as I write that.  The extenuating circumstances or my general appearance doesn’t dissuade them.   They see me – who I really am. 

The face of depression is never the true story of what is going on.   Some people are dying inside and look completely put together; while others appear un-kept or out of it.   I guess I’m somewhere in between. 

Here’s the lesson in all of this.   Never assume about a person by what you see on the outside, depression has many faces.

Step One, Be Honest

Depression is usually an individual’s struggle.   First, you don’t realize what kind of funk you have slipped in to until it is too late.   I felt it coming, I knew I was slipping, but what could I do?   I admitted it.   I captured myself at the right time.  I didn’t allow myself to suffer long without asking for help.   I got to the doctor – not the right doctor, but a doctor, still.   I alerted my family.    I started asking for help.

By the time I made it to the right doctor, I was in a complete  “major depression episode bordering on crisis”.   The doctor upped my meds, and we discussed alternative meds and treatments.   He sent in for more tests and a doc that I could see on a more frequent basis.   We established what my medical situation was going to be, and outlined our plan of action.

I had already grabbed my “scripture flash cards” that I keep on hand to remind me of God’s unconditional love and guidance and His promises for an abundant life.   So, medical side covered, spiritual side covered, now what do I do about those graduation parties, birthday parties, weddings, dinners out, and school activities that were just way too much for me to attend.   What do I do about the friends who needed my advice, or prayers, or moral support?

I was tired of excuses.  I decided to be honest.  So, after thinking about it, I posted this on my facebook page.   I had no idea what I was going encounter, but I did it anyway:

Kristi Maas June 20 at 3:54pm · Riverside, CA ·

In my very matter of a fact tone: "Major Depression Episode" is what the psych doc thinks I am experiencing. I've been sitting on this for about 3 weeks, but it occurred to me that I haven't been active in anything, so I thought I would explain why. I very much wish it were a broken leg so that I could explain what is going on with me physiologically, but unless you've been there, you just don't know.

As sweetly as I can say this: If you want me to change my diet, increase my exercise, take a certain supplement, or read my Bible more, please don't tell me. I am under enough condemnation already from my own self. If you would like to bring me something healthy to eat, invite me to walk when its not 105 degrees outside, have a link or have a scripture for me, I would appreciate that.

I am relying on God and medicine to get me through. I've been through this before, I know the territory, and I will make it through again. I am waiting on Kaiser to see what kind of program they are going to put me in. If you have read this whole thing that means that you are my good friend, and I appreciate you and don't take for granted the good things and blessings God has given me.

I wasn’t quite sure what to expect, then I was overwhelmed with the response.   I received responses within one minute of my post, and they just kept coming.  Still, four days later, I am still receiving great responses.   All because I was honest.

My spirits were lifted immediately.   Knowing that people were really looking out for me, and knowing that they understood why I couldn’t be the person I thought they expected me to be brought me such freedom.    The step of basically “shouting from the roof tops” was my breakthrough.  

After months of not wanting to go to church, I wanted to go, knowing that those who really cared about me would let me be anonymous without expecting anything from me.    A friend went to the grocery store for me, and I did not feel guilty about sending her.   Another friend came and colored my hair, and didn’t require me to talk.  I had the offer of a massage, lots of offers “to talk anytime,”  an offer to go stay with friends in another state, and someone offered to bring over food.

The response was humbling.  After all of these years of asking people to help at the church, I didn’t feel like I could ask for anything more.   I didn’t ask, they offered.    I took a few up on their offers.  I guess that’s another step I had to take.   I had to actually receive the help – help I had given over the past many years, but this time, I was on the receiving end.   Some might think that I was just elated and sat back and had a spa day, but the feelings of I didn’t deserve it came over me – I’m fighting those now.

I will share the lessons I have learned from this experience at another time, because I am still in the learning process.  This is what life is all about, taking the bad things and making something good come out of it.   That’s the God way of doing things.

(I Corinthians 10:13b)” …. But with the trial God will always also provide the way out – the means of escape to a landing place, so that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently.”

Its Time To Give It Up?

Do you ever get the gnawing feeling that you are forgetting something?  It happens to me all of the time.  Lately I am having "vocabulary" challenges.  Such as, I know there is a word that envelopes the entirety of the point I want to make, but some how its just not on the tip of my tongue - how annoying!



I entered in to fear thinking this was the beginning of early on-set Alzheimers, but then I discovered something about myself.   After I have had about 2 diet sodas, my vocabulary recall worsens.  The more diet soda I have, the fuzzier my brain becomes.

I don't want to hear about how diet soda is bad for me, etc.  I know it is.  Diet soda is my vice.  I love coke zero.   The most common artificial sweetener in diet sodas in aspartame.  In addition to many things, a side effect of aspartame is memory loss.  Oh, Lord, I did not want to give up my vice.  My diet soda is like the nectar of the gods.  That first drink is so satisfying - if you are a morning coffee drinker, you know what I'm talking about.

Last year I gave it up.  Cold turkey.  I was in bed for a day, in pain in every joint in my body.  I could not believe the pain I was in.  It didn't occur to me to supplement the caffeine, so not only was I detoxing the sweetener, I was going caffeine-less.   Oh, that was horrible.   It took about three days - without complaining - for me to start feeling like myself again.  I did however, start drinking green tea with caffeine and used Stevia as my sweetener.

It lasted 3 weeks.   I went to Belize.   I got on the plane, "what would you like to drink?", the flight attendant asked.  I said, coke.  I drank a coke.   Mmmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmmm!  That was good!  Then I started buzzing.  The sugar and the caffeine.  Woow!   Ok, that was system overload.   I wasn't sure about drinking the water in Belize although the resort had promised it was filtered, and we were able to get bottled water most of the time, but how was I supposed to get my morning caffeine?  I didn't have the means to make iced tea, and that diet coke looked so good .... I caved.  Diet coke, here I come!  Its been over a year now, and even though I have tried, I can't get off the diet soda - Coke Zero is my vice.

If I want complete vocabulary recall, if I want to be healthier, if I want to not be addicted to something, it is time.  I can not let my love for coke zero run my life.  Coke zero has become a god to me, and I crave it every morning, I can not function with out it.  What am I going to do?

No, really, what am I going to do?   I have tried tea - tea and coffee upset my stomach.  How can coke zero not upset my stomach if tea and coffee do?  I don't know, moving on.

I have to give it up.  I don't know when, where or how, but it has to happen.  It sounds easy, but really is it?  Put it in to a different perspective.

I have a friend who has a situation in her life that has become a god to her.   She can't give it up.  Every time she runs in to someone that she hasn't seen in a while, "catching up" means that she tells the whole story, the whole situation, not a detail left out.   Usually there isn't time for the other person to share what is going on in their life, she monopolizes their time with her issue.   I have mentioned to her that she needs to move on.   Her comment to me is, "Well, Kristi, you just don't know, if you were in this situation, you would do the same thing."

It is time for her to give it up.  It is time for her to take herself out of the situation.  Is it as easy as going off diet soda?   I don't know.  I do know it is holding her back, just like diet soda is holding me back in many ways.

My husband has a real estate business.  Recently an old friend, a realtor, came to work in his office.  The realtor brought with him some deals that were in the works.  One of his deals involved a man that had a grudge against my father from 30 years ago.   The man told the realtor that since he had gone to work for a Halvorson (my husband is clearly a Maas) that the realtor could no longer have the deal.  The man took his deal, that man took money from a family, because he had a grudge against a man who would never know this deal was transpiring.   The man would have to find another realtor, start all over again, and hope he received the good prices, honesty, and integrity that this realtor had to offer.  The whole situation is ridiculous.  After 30 years, it is time for that man to give it up.

These three scenarios may seem silly to you, but what do you have that is holding you back?  Is it as simple as giving up diet soda?   I don't hold grudges - not that I know of anyway, I could much easier forgive someone than give up diet soda - it is true!  I would think that I could easier quit living in a dead situation that my friends were willing to help me move out of, than I could give up my diet soda.   It's all perspective.

God says that His strength is sufficient for us.   He says He will give us the grace, favor, loving kindness and mercy to bear our trouble manfully.  He tells us that He will provide a way out. (2 Corinthians 12)

It is time for me to give up my diet soda.  God is going to have to give me a way out, because I can't do it on my own.  Very soon you will read that I have successfully given up diet soda.   Until then you can pray for me.

Maybe there is something in your life that you need to ask God to help you give up.  We all have something we hang on to that is not good for us.  I know that God is going to help me, and I know He is going to help you.

K

Do I Really Know Jesus?

A friend of mine recently said, "Jesus was a prophet who taught love and acceptance."   My dear friend is my age and I thought he was raised the way I was.  Apparently he has now decided to acknowledge Jesus as a prophet, not as the son of God.  I thought, oh, did we not know the same Jesus when we were young?

Then I realized how Jesus is presented to children.  Mostly Jesus is some unrelatable subject, a figment of heaven that a child can not even conceive.  He is portrayed as a gentle, passive guy, who just wants everyone to live in peace and harmony.

That's all fine and dandy, but do you really know  Jesus?



Most don't realize that Jesus had a sharp tongue.  At one time He told a woman that she was worth less than a dog.  (Matthew 15)  At least three times Jesus called the religious elders "vipers", or "spawn of viper" which in our terms translates to the worst kind of snake.  (Matthew 3, 12, 23).  Then there's that pesky little situation of "no one gets to the Father, but by Me" and He won't budge on that matter. (John 14:6)

Jesus Himself said,  "Do you suppose that I have come to give peace upon earth?  No, I say to you, but rather division."  (Luke 12)  In John 6, Jesus was teaching, and because the people didn't understand his teaching through metaphor, and thought His message was too strong, they stopped following Him.  When that happened, He pointedly asked His twelve what they were going to do, and sharply told them that one of them was the devil.  Yeah, umm, hmmm, the whole "What Would Jesus Do" thing, that kind of doesn't correspond with the Jesus that I just examined.

How Do You Know What Jesus Would Do If You Don't Know What Jesus Did?

I'm still angry at my childhood friend who so totally doesn't understand Jesus - but because he was raised in the church thinks that he does.  He thinks Christians are mean and judgemental, and that they are not acting like Jesus if they have an opinion that might offend someone.   Well, yes, Christians are mean and judgemental because they are human, and humans are mean and judgemental.  Unless you are a born in oblivion or love to debate, people don't usually like to deal with others that have differing opinions.

I think that I am angry because his opinions, and mine, both stem from emotion.  Its really interesting when emotion enters the debate.   Its no longer what you "think", but what you "feel."   I "feel" like Jesus would have acted differently in this situation.  You "feel"?  Do you "know"?  How well do you "know" Jesus?

Jesus told us to turn the other cheek, (Matthew 5) but isn't that the opposite of Him coming to divide?  (Luke 12)  I believe (think and feel) that when Jesus was talking about turning the other cheek, He was discussing the topic of revenge.   The Apostle Paul discusses in the book of Romans that God said that He will repay - vengeance belongs to God.  When Jesus was asked about the situation of the woman being stoned, He wrote in the dirt, and offered, if you have never sinned, then throw the first stone.  (John 8)

Jesus wasn't just a prophet that came to teach joy, peace, and love.   He is the son of God who came to defeat death.  He came to bruise the head of the enemy.  Justice isn't always fun.  The truth does hurt.  Life is hard.   Jesus came to open a relationship with God - it is that relationship that will heal, bind the hurt, and mend the broken hearts.  Jesus came to pave the way for the Holy Spirit.   That's where the joy, peace, and love really come from.

I'm sorry that Christians have such a bad reputation among this generation.  It hurts my feelings when I am judged because I am a Christian, but I won't give up my faith.  I'm sorry that my friend is so entranced with what is politically correct that he will go to hell.  Perhaps before he dies he will have an opportunity to acknowledge Jesus as the son of God, I pray he does.

K